Sunday, February 17, 2008

The Funny bone

"Rs.1000 for a good laugh and we are not joking!"read the ad for the Reader's Digest jokes column.It was those times, when I was a naive reader who digested everything I read and started keeping my senses alert for the slightest tickle of the funny bone.Inspite of my lazy habits, I managed to send in a couple of entries too.However, there were better laughs at RD and my 'laughs' went down the drain.I add a few from my collection before they are lost when mum sells my old physics record to the paper hawker.

* My brother Neil once broke his arm and had a cast on it.Back from school the next after noon,it was covered with "plaster art".The best one was "Neil Arm-broken".

*The bus we hired for our class tour was named "Suganthy".I was commenting on what an ridiculous name it was for a bus to a classmate when she said,quietly ,"That's my mother's name".

*Discussing his future plans my 10 year old cousin declared his ambition take up their family business.His
entrepreneurial skills were evident when he stated a name change for their store,"Chris & father"!

*My aunt named her two sons John and Paul and her daughter Liz.At a family gathering,where we were discussing names,she observed that it was fashionable to name kids after the reigning Pope.My little cousin turns to Liz and says,"so you should have been "the Second"! ".

*Our aunt used to ask us what we wanted to have whenever she visited from the US.Not wanting my little cousin to make tall demands,my aunt kept the news of their arrival a secret until the were safely on board the plane.Undaunted,my cousin asks"Can we call them up on the flight?"

*We were taking an evening walk when we came across a car which had large "WALK WITH JESUS"sticker across the windshield.Passing it my mum quipped"Funny people,they still needed a car and wont bother to give Jesus a lift!"

*Our poetry professor was musing about the paper valuation camp that she had been to.There was an essay on Browning's "My Last Duchess" and many had written on the evil 'Duch', and the 'Duck' instead of the Duke.

*Our moral science paper coincided with the chemistry practicals.In the essay many confused "morality" and "molarity".

*We were having a hectic day in the chemistry lab analysing the salt mixture when the peon brought in a lunchbox someone had forgotten.Our teacher rapped the desk and said"Hurry up girls,we've got one more analysis to do."We looked up exasperated when she added with a smile,"Lunchbox analysis!".

*In our Chemistry class the lecturer hung up the Periodic table and asked a guy to spot Pottasium.He frantically scans the Table and minutes later, triumphantly plants his finger on "P"!

"A smile is a fortune but you can't sell it,
you can't buy it and you can't steal it,but it isn't any good to anyone until it is given away."
So there.... :)


silverine said...

This was too good!! You can easily make a couple of thousands here with a little editing like this:

We were taking an evening walk when we came across a car. Pasted across its windshield was a sticker that read "WALK WITH JESUS"!!

Your lil cuz is damn smart. 'Chris and Father' has to be the ultimate rebuttal to all those "Chris and Sons" type of name for family orgs :))

p.s I suggest allowing Anon comments as you have comment moderation. Many readers dont have blogs :)

mathew said...

got this link from think pad..must say absolute ROTFL stuff...esp the Neil Arm Broken and ur mom's comment abt the car...very good timing in all the incidents..would love to see more of em coming..

when i read the chemistry joke it reminds me of chemistry in school..she used to wear a particular saree with polka dots on it..and many guys used to say.."dey kando...even moles and molecules on the saree"

Neena Padayatty said...

Thank u for those valuable tips.I really have to shorten my sentences and mind my punctuations.
Chris'a.k.a Richu's jokes are famous in the family.But unfortunately some of them lose the punch if translated.
Thanks a million!
Thank u for popping in...and ur chem class incident is worth a thousand rupees ur ambrosia blog...keeping away from it till after Lent...too tempting!

silverine said...

"I really have to shorten my sentences and mind my punctuations

Only for Reders Digest! For your blog, just chill and write without these tensions :)

Deepti said...

Got the link from Think pad ...nicely written ... let me tell you, toughest blogs to write are the funny ones and if you can make even 10 people laugh in a day, you have done an amazing job !!!!

Neena Padayatty said...

Only too happy to learn.please feel free to point out scopes for improvement.Thanks:)
Thank u for visting and the nice words!

mathew said...

plzz...esp the grammar part!!;-P

Lol!! are asking for advice
from Silverine?..tough luck!!;-P

seriously.dont think a blog like a thesis is good just like now..

Jiby said...

had a nice laugh...nothing makes me so happy as reading real-life humorous anecdotes. hey...i was also a failed reader's digest contributor a long time back.

i slightly disagree with should mind your punctuations and grammar when you are blogging about thoughtful stuff! it doesnt apply to comments though! :)

silverine said...

@Jiby: "you should mind your punctuations and grammar when you are blogging about thoughtful stuff"

I agree! :)